Funny/Inspiring Video
Brother Quotes
My little brother, will you ever grow up….I hope not!
-Catherine Pulsifer
Help your brother’s boat across, and your own will reach the shore.
-Proverb
A brother is a friend God gave you; a friend is a brother your heart chose for you.
-Proverb
To the outside world we all grow old.
But not to brothers and sisters.
We know each other as we always were. We know each other’s hearts.
We share private family jokes.
We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys.
We live outside the touch of time.
-Clara Ortega
There is a little boy inside the man who is my brother. Oh, how I hated that little boy. And how I love him too.
-Anna Quindlan
There’s no other love like the love for a brother. There’s no other love like the love from a brother.
- Astrid Alauda
Laughter Quotes
The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
-E.E. Cummings
Laughter is an instant vacation.
-Milton Berle
I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
-Woody Allen
Even if there is nothing to laugh about, laugh on credit.
-Author Unknown
Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.
-Victor Borge
What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul.
-Yiddish Proverb
A man isn’t poor if he can still laugh.
-Raymond Hitchcock
Sibling Quotes
Our brothers and sisters are there with us from the dawn of our personal stories to the inevitable dusk.
-Susan Scarf Merrell
Never make a companion equal to a brother.
-Hesiod
A sibling may be the keeper of one’s identity, the only person with the keys to one’s unfettered, more fundamental self.
-Marian Sandmaier
The mildest, drowsiest sister has been known to turn tiger if her sibling is in trouble.
-Clara Ortega
Siblings are the people we practice on, the people who teach us about fairness and cooperation and kindness and caring – quite often the hard way.
-Pamela Dugdale
You can kid the world. But not your sister.
-Charlotte Gray
Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five.
-Pam Brown
It was nice growing up with someone like you – someone to lean on, someone to count on… someone to tell on!
-Author Unknown
Funny Love Quotes
Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener!
-Unknown
You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.
-Henny Youngman
Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
- Unknown
A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life to be thankful for a good one.
-Mae West
My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.
-Winston Churchill
Love is being stupid together.
-Paul Valery
Funny Birthday Quotes
We know we’re getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.
- Unknown
There is still no cure for the common birthday.
-John Glenn
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip.
- Unknown
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
-Herbert Asquith
May you live to be a hundred years
With one extra year to repent.
-Unknown
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
-Larry Lorenzoni
Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.
-Unknown
Quotes about Mondays
“On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.”
- H. Allen Smith
“Sometimes it pays to stay in bed in Monday, rather than spending the rest of the week debugging Monday’s code.”
- Dan Salomon
“I always give 100% at work:13% Monday
22% Tuesday
26% Wednesday
35% Thursday
4% Friday”
- Unknown
“Monday is the key day of the week.”
-Gaelic Proverb
Quotes about Women
I prefer the word homemaker, because housewife always implies that there may be a wife someplace else.
-Bella Abzug
The girls that are always easy on the eyes are never easy on the heart.
- Unknown
I would rather trust a woman’s instinct than a man’s reason.
-Stanley Baldwin
The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve them.
-Robert Graves
Women like silent men. They think they’re listening.
-Marcel Achard
Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
-Bill Maher
Food Quotes
The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.
-Johnny Carson
I love Thanksgiving turkey…it’s the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.
-Arnold Schwarzenegger
Once, during prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
-W.C. Fields
Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat.
-Jim Davis
McDonald’s announced it’s considering a more humane way of slaughtering its animals. You know, they fatten them up and then kill them. You know, thats the same thing they do to their customers, isn’t it?
-Jay Leno
Valentine Quotes
Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit.
-Peter Ustinov
Don’t talk to me about Valentine’s Day. At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!
-Joan Rivers
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
-Robert Frost
Love is more than three words mumbled before bedtime. Love is sustained by action, a pattern of devotion in the things we do for each other every day.
-Nicholas Sparks
I don’t understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine’s Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.
-Unknown
